I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
