I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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