i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
