No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
