It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
