last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
