this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
