Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize