For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
