Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
