Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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