I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
