fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
