My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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