Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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