If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
