Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Randomize
