I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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