You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
