I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
