I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
