lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
