Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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