I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
