Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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