He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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