I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
