Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
