it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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