office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize