Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
