I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize