Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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