At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
