we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
