sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Come see our sink grown plant.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
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