no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
