Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize