I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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