I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
