dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
