Only a mothe r could love this liver
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Dicks are not precious.
Randomize