4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
