one two three fourrrrnication!
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Randomize
