How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
