If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
It's blow job season.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
