Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
