This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
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