just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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