just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I think your dad took our porno
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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