is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
